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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Be warned, this is going to be ugly. I had been looking forward to this, to finally run a race with distance of greater than 5K and hopefully get a good measure on the progress I've been making. As today approached, I grew a bit more apprehensive about the return of heat and humidity, but it's still early in September so that can happen.<br><br>
As a type 1 diabetic, in some ways my greatest fear about the racing is the possibility of waking up with a bad blood sugar. For that reason, I had set an alarm for 1:30 and when I woke up, a poke of a finger revealed that I was at 87 mg/dl. To guard against going hypo, I popped a glucose tablet with 4g of carbs, as in past experience that has usually served me well to keep me nearly stable until I wake up later.<br><br>
6:10. I wake up and I find my blood sugar is 264 mg/dl. Wtf? I tested with another strip and meter to be sure it was accurate, and got 250 mg/dl. Fuck. Currently my best explanation of this is probably that I hypoed some time overnight, maybe around 5 AM or so, and my body responded with adrenaline and the liver pumping out the glucose from glycogen supplies.<br><br>
Oh well. I jabbed up with some fast acting insulin and hoped to get my blood sugar down to a good level for race time. It can be a dicey situation when the body has rebounded, I find, sometimes the fast acting brings you down quickly, and other times depending on what all happened while sleeping, it can be a couple of hours before the fast acting begins to show effect.<br><br>
I was somewhat happy to see that when I left a little after 7:30, the blood sugar had dropped to 180 mg/dl. At least that went right for me.<br><br>
I got to the race registration about 8:15. It was already sticky hot and humid. I even considered just going with 5K, but I really wanted to test the 10K distance. Blood sugar upon arrival had reached 149 mg/dl, the shot I had given earlier was petering out.<br><br>
Now I had a decision to try to finagle. Did I leave things alone or go with more insulin? Sometimes after a hypo and my fast acting insulin has been working well, more insulin on top of that will make me plummet more. On the other hand, I was beginning to feel adrenaline about being there. I shot up with 1 unit.<br><br>
At 9:06, my blood sugar was again 149 mg/dl. I jabbed up with another unit of insulin.<br><br>
Race started about 9:20. After leaving the parking, nasty uphill greeted us all. My legs didn't feel all that good. I didn't feel like I was running all that fast, but my heart rate quickly climbed.<br><br>
I reached mile 1 in 10:01. But that was a hard feeling 10:01. Still, at least we were starting to get more downhill than uphill.<br><br>
I was really suspecting trouble when the second mile split was 10:15. I was already feeling beat up some, and despite more downhill my pace had slowed. Oh boy.<br><br>
I tried easing back and slowing down. Heart rate refused to budge down and the third mile was an ugly 12:29.<br><br>
I hit the start of the second loop around 33 something, I didn't get the split.<br><br>
Then came the uphill of the loop again. It killed me. Near its top, I said, "Fuck it" and began walking. That's the way things would go the rest of the way. I would walk, run some and feel horrible running. Walk some more. Run, feel horrible.<br><br>
I missed the 4 mile marker and hit split at 4.1 13:23 for 1.1 miles. Ugh. The next .9 miles would take 10:29. The sixth mile I just resigned myself that it was a bad run and rather than beating myself into the ground, I walked most of it -- 14:47. With that, I gave myself enough to run the last .2 miles in 2:07 and finish my first 10K race in about 1:13:30.<br><br>
That sucked. I had hoped at least for 62 minutes or better, maybe going after less than 60 minutes.<br><br>
But maybe because of the weather, I got the second place medal for the 30-39 age group. Or as I said when it was handed to me, "A medal for last place."<br><br>
Not the race I dreamed of.<br><br>
Oh yeah, blood sugar was 220 mg/dl when finished. Fuck again.
 

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No,not the race you dreamed of. We, all of us - diabetic or not - have races that suck. Truth. It can be quite disheartening to have trained and dreamed and worked hard to achieve those dreams and have it all come apart through things that you can't control.<br><br>
Weather... illness... other factors.<br><br>
Was it disappointing for you, hell yes. Should you beat yourself up about it, hell no.<br><br>
Your medal wasn't for being last. You sure ask heck beat the thousands who weren't running, and the hundreds who might have but said "not today".<br><br>
There will be other races. Just remember why it is that you run and pick yourself up and go at it again.<br><br>
You might also want to seek out an MD who is a runner to talk about strategies to control your diabetes. I run with a couple of gals who are Type I and, I know just how hard it can be to maintain an even keel.<br><br>
Best of luck!
 

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Hey ScratchType1,<br>
Argh! I'm sorry it didn't go as you had hoped. I can't imagine how much you need to plan and strategize because of the diabetes.<br><br>
I seem to recall that one of your earlier goals was to run a sub 30 5k, which was my goal at the time too. I subsequently reached that goal. Barely. Anyway, I recently did a 10k in about the same time as you did here.<br><br>
We can do it!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
The anger is fading some now. No one ever hopes for a bad race and there's always that chance, I'm not the first to have one go wrong and I won't be the last either. I just had a nasty convergence of some bad circumstances and in spite of that, in spite of the absolute nadir of knowing a vehicle was tailing behind me and seeing the two people I might have had a faint chance of catching disappear ahead of me, I didn't stop. I kept going. I took the hand I was dealt and played the best result I could get for what happened. Like you said, <b>Grizzly</b>, that was more than probably 99% of the population could say today. And it's a hell of a lot more than I could do this time last year.<br><br>
And I've got a 5K on the schedule for next weekend. It may not be the do-over I might like, but I've got another chance and another go at things.
 

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Hey Scratch...I couldn't agree with Grizz more. You did good today. You may have experienced disappointment, but it was disappointment on your terms. You trained for this, you ran this race, you did it. There are so many that choose not to do it for a variety of reasons. You are an inspiration...the true meaning of the human spirit.
 

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I can't believe the person that handed you that medal said that to you! At any rate, it sounds like it was a very small field because you most definitely wouldn't have been last at any of the races around here.<br><br>
You did excellent for your circumstances. I really wish you could've been 100% today; I wanted to see if you managed that under 60 minute thing (I have yet to do that...sigh).
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
No, that was me jibing myself, Nettie. I tend towards self-deprecatory sense of humor and I was actually laughing at the seeming absurdity of it. Me finishing last and getting a medal. I don't know how many can say that. It was oddly funny and funny enough I had to say it out loud. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Very Happy">
 

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Oh ok! I thought that guy from Prae's race may have started following members of the 30s around to piss on them. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/cool.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Cool"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Very Happy">
 

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<b>Scratch</b> as I said on the thread. I have no idea what its like to deal with diabeties let alone trying to manage it and run. My hat is off to you just for that fact.<br><br>
We dont always have good races but you were out there and finished, thats the most important thing. THe next one will be better for ya, hang in there bud!
 

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Scatch - way to hang tough. Don't beat yourself up on this one. Just like there are hard/bad runs, there are bad races too. It's all part of the experience. How you deal with it and how you move on is what matters. You lived to fight again another day...and maybe the next day will be your day. The stars and moon will align and not only will you perform well, but everything will go you way. It's a sweat ride when it all goes right. Almost like effortless running. It's out there, but it's not always there, you just gotta keep digging at it.<br><br>
Great Job!
 

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It wasn't pretty, but you hung in there anyway. Billy Joel says you learn more from your accidents than you could ever learn in school. I like to list things that I may be able to change next time. Maybe there is nothing, but sometimes it helps to think about.
 

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Way to hang tough. I was in the heat and humidity today too and can't imagine having to deal with your medical issues on top of that.<br><br>
It may not have been a great race but it was a great run.
 

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Scratch,<br><br>
Really, I can't say anything that hasn't been said before. Yes, you had a race that wasn't what you'd planned for. However, you "cowboy'ed it up", and saw it through.<br><br>
I also agree with Nettie.. it sounds like the race was a small one, as I can guarantee that your time for a 10k would have been nowhere near the back of the pack, in the events I've been in. Hell, (before my injury, of course), I wasn't even capable of your speed on a 10k! Don't sell yourself short, my friend!<br><br>
We all have craptastic for reasons that are in or out of our control. Be proud of yourself for sticking through this one, and get ready to tackle that 5k next weekend! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Smile"> We have faith in ya!
 

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Scratch, you have an attitude that would enable you to you leap mountains if you wanted to. You didn't let this race course, this gawdawful humidity, or your medical condition to do anything more than force you to walk a bit.<br><br>
You keep on running even though it's never just "lace up and go" for you. I admire that immensely.
 

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Ditto what everyone else has said here, <b>Scratch</b>. Sure it was disappointment on a personal basis, but pretty much every other runner, you're learning as you venture forth in your running career. And unlike others, you have one other factor to account for, and it's a huge one to boot.<br><br>
I think considering where you've been, you've made a lot of progress, and many others can't even claim to have toed the line for a 10K race. Kudos on gutting it out and getting across the finish line. Digest what happened, learn as best as you can, and move on...and hey, you've got an interesting story related to that AG medal to boot.
 

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Congratulations, <b>Scratch</b>, for running a 10K, surviving the humidity and blood sugar - and getting a medal for your troubles! You've come so far and are doing remarkable things. Just think, from here, the remarkable will just get remarkabler - if you know what I mean.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Smile">
 

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good job on training for, running, and completing a 10k! hope your next race is a little easier and that your BS cooperates <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

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Congrats, Scratch, on pushing through a tough day. Don't listen to what they guy said. Everyone has a bad run sometimes. Just gotta keep going. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.kickrunners.com/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Smile"> Thanks for sharing it with us.
 
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