<p>.......whoa! Imagine knowing you won't see another Christmas. You will be seeing people, doing things for the last time. I love life, love it, love it. To know that's all about to end.....oh man. All those books I never read, all that music I never heard...........oh man. Knowing that my love ones will have to go on without me......that brings a tear to my eye.</p>
Knowing you are dying.......
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<p>Grandma has just started saying "if I'm here next year..." Yah, I know she's 95yo. She still lives every day to the fullest. She'll have her second surgery on Thursday to try to restore some of her vision. She loves to read but hasn't been able to make out the print even in large print books.</p>
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<p>At the nursing home I see both sides. Some people have stopped living and are just waiting to die. Others live every day to the fullest, knowing it might be their last.</p>
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<p>At the nursing home I see both sides. Some people have stopped living and are just waiting to die. Others live every day to the fullest, knowing it might be their last.</p>
<p> There often comes a time when the individual simply decides that they're done.</p>
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<p> My uncle was operating on less than one full lung. He'd been taking supplemental oxygen for several years, but had finally been placed on a ventilator. Everything else was still in good shape - just the lungs were gone. (Yes, he'd been a multi-year smoker.) He had the family come together from all different parts of the country (seven kids, and assorted grand-kids and great grand-kids) so they could say goodbye and clear up any final lingering issues (one cousin often thought her dad didn't like her, and he was able to show her why she was wrong). Afterward, those that could handle it stayed with him while they literally "pulled the plug", and those that couldn't waited in the hospital's chapel.</p>
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<p> Much more recently, one of my parent's friends decided he had had enough. He's one of those cantankerous old farts that knows everybody but by damn, is going to live by his rules. He was having some intermittent balance problems and his legs were not quite up to task anymore, but he was still pretty strong for someone who was 93. My folks stopped by his hospital room one morning about a month ago, and he told them "I'm done!" That afternoon, he was.</p>
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<p> My uncle was operating on less than one full lung. He'd been taking supplemental oxygen for several years, but had finally been placed on a ventilator. Everything else was still in good shape - just the lungs were gone. (Yes, he'd been a multi-year smoker.) He had the family come together from all different parts of the country (seven kids, and assorted grand-kids and great grand-kids) so they could say goodbye and clear up any final lingering issues (one cousin often thought her dad didn't like her, and he was able to show her why she was wrong). Afterward, those that could handle it stayed with him while they literally "pulled the plug", and those that couldn't waited in the hospital's chapel.</p>
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<p> Much more recently, one of my parent's friends decided he had had enough. He's one of those cantankerous old farts that knows everybody but by damn, is going to live by his rules. He was having some intermittent balance problems and his legs were not quite up to task anymore, but he was still pretty strong for someone who was 93. My folks stopped by his hospital room one morning about a month ago, and he told them "I'm done!" That afternoon, he was.</p>
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<p>my mom was given 6-9 months at the end of October ... pretty realistic scenario here ...</p>
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<p>hubby says fight with everything you've got to the bitter end ... mom says quality of life = much more than quantity ... and with rhuematoid arthritis and 2 very close loved ones coming to ugly ends in spite of chemo and radiation she's chosen to not fight in that manner ... we're doing what we can and all living our lives as normally as possible while awaiting the inevitable ...</p>
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<p>I can't say I'd do it the same way as mom in her situation but I respect her decision and support her in it ... </p>
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<p>hubby says fight with everything you've got to the bitter end ... mom says quality of life = much more than quantity ... and with rhuematoid arthritis and 2 very close loved ones coming to ugly ends in spite of chemo and radiation she's chosen to not fight in that manner ... we're doing what we can and all living our lives as normally as possible while awaiting the inevitable ...</p>
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<p>I can't say I'd do it the same way as mom in her situation but I respect her decision and support her in it ... </p>
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<p>Paraphrased from my friend Sue: "I know he's staring me in the face... (she puts her hand out inches from her face). He's there, I am not ignoring him, but I choose not to look at him. I'm looking over there (she turns to the right), and I won't let him get in the way."</p>
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513 Posts
<p>To Mark and Grizz and Sporti and all others who are dealing with illness of family, my heart goes out to you all, and my support as well.</p>
<p>My Mom, who was diagnosed with anal cancer in Dec. of 2009, had a colostomy and lots of chemo and radiation, and thank God, it has been successful so far. </p>
<p>She's only 68 and just had a check-up and the scans didn't detect any cancer cells.</p>
<p>It's been an opportunity for me and the rest of my family to come together and be supportive.</p>
<p>Hang in there.</p>
<p>My Mom, who was diagnosed with anal cancer in Dec. of 2009, had a colostomy and lots of chemo and radiation, and thank God, it has been successful so far. </p>
<p>She's only 68 and just had a check-up and the scans didn't detect any cancer cells.</p>
<p>It's been an opportunity for me and the rest of my family to come together and be supportive.</p>
<p>Hang in there.</p>
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