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How to handle pleas for help?

544 Views 8 Replies 6 Participants Last post by  altoids
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Multiple levels of questions here, from a personal standpoint, what do you do?<br><br>
What are our personal obligations / restrictions?<br><br>
What are our legal obligations / restrictions?<br><br>
What are our moral obligations / restrictions?<br><br>
I called a halt to the search for EQ because it held the potential to cross boundaries, but this situation is different.
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I think we have to be carefull, I mean how long has she actually been "missing"? Since 7pm your time and what time is it now for you?<br><br>
It's an odd thing to post for sure, I don't pretend to understand many people's reasons for opening up so much here.<br><br>
OT1H She posted therefore it implies that she's worried/scared/wants help<br><br>
OTOH She could have just gone for a run, without knowing more I don't think we can panic. Visiting her house seems a little extreme, everyone in KR bombarding her with private messages, emails, IMs and emails may not be the best idea either!
She's posted numerous threads like this in the past, in the CH, but most were deleted. There were A LOT of questionable threads that people asked about the validity of some of her claims. I cannot even think of the number of times she posted that she was being abused by Nate or raped or going to kill herself. Seems like a pattern with her. What to do? i am not sure.
I'm not sure we can do anything. People can and do choose to respond to her. From a 'philosophical' or 'policy' procedure (sorry for the callousness of that statement) - the only thing I would suggest is that as a moderator you don't let it get to a 'she's full of shit' or an 'attention whore' type comment. I think people should assume her comments are 'real' and treat them accordingly. And to the extent the members have responded, I think it's appropriate. I'd rather we respond to 'wolf cries' everytime and not be 'dulled' by them.<br><br>
Depression is real and something few can understand unless they've experienced it themselves.<br><br>
watch the thread griz - and do what you feel is best.
I think the situation was handled appropriately today by everyone. I am just saying this is a pattern that she has gone thru over and over and over again through the past several years. I do not think one person called her an AW or doubted her statements in their replies. I am just saying what i think, but i would NEVER post that on the open forum but keeping it between the mods behind closed doors.
I'll second what Meri just said. This is the one subject on which Meri and I may disagree a bit, but I've also been party to some stuff, public and private, that would suggest a drama pattern.<br><br>
But I think what everyone did today was about as perfect as possible. Grizz, you were gold. Sublety, gentleness, and a quiet footprint would seem to be the best among poor options.<br><br>
Thanks everyone for being so good at this. I'm learning life lessons from you all.
Merigayle and Hippo... I agree 100% with your comments - yes, the site did a wonderful job handling and Griz, as always, has the finesse of surgeon in handling delicate issues....<br><br>
But... I did nothing. I know I did it with panache and style, but I did nothing.<br><br>
I thought of it a few times, like right now when people are PMing and Texting and stuff. But...<br><br>
I'm off for bed.
Hi Grizz, your post was good, but I was wondering if it is going to be time to lock it soon?<br><br>
I think people are just going to keep on posting advice ...
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