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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
and have kids, how do you find the time to work out? I want my husband to work out more, but he says there isn't enough time. He has a very demanding job that stresses him out, then in the evening he wants to spend time with the kids. How do you all find the time?
 

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Simply put you make the time. What about weekends or exercising with the kids? My DH swims at lunchtime 3-4 days/week. He does no other sport because thats all he feels he has time for.<br><br>
It took him years to get to this point , if he doesn't want it badly enough it's hard to find the time.
 

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I get up at 5. I'm done with typical morning runs before kids are up. I also get a lot of workouts on my lunch hour at work. I'm fortunate to have a gym hear but, even when I didn't, lunch time runs were a great way to relieves some stress, On the weekends, I try to keep the same early schedule so I can spend the rest of the day doing stuff with the family.<br><br>
Oh and... He's probably not gonna find ways to work out more because <i>you</i> want him to - only if <i>he</i> wants to.
 

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Although I do not have kids, the truth is that from what I have witnessed in my friends with kids, if working out is a priority, they will find time for it, even if it means doing early-early morning workouts, the late shift, at the noon hour, or at some point. Excuses, such as "I don't have time," are the token slogan for someone who is not yet ready to make it a priority. And that's okay. But it can't be forced unless the person is truly on edge of doing it themselves.<br><br>
So perhaps your husband just isn't quite ready to get out there. Because we all know that the drive has to come from within. For some it's about being healthy, for others it's about getting faster, and for others it's something entirely different. But the common theme is that they all are motivated to do it. He has to be too. And not just because his wife wants him to. And if all of this is correct, then all you can do is continue to support him and continue to show him ways in a non-threatening way how he can fit in the time. And also be sure to reward him with genuine praise when he does take a step forward, because that will no doubt make him feel even better about what he just did and shine light on how fun it really is.
 

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I don't work, but my husband does (same situation you are in). Now, my husband's job is pretty flexible, so he doesn't work really late, but we were both training at the same time (he was training for a marathon, and I was training for a half marathon), so it took some creative planning. He always went running on Tuesday evenings while DDs were at gymnastics. Their gymnastics is across the street from our 1 mile trail, so they would walk to gymnastics, then he would run for an hour (I would do the same pushing my son in the jogger stroller). Then, he and I would switch off running our long runs on opposite weekends. Sometimes I'd run on Saturday morning and he would run on Sunday afternoon. He would also go running on Thursday evenings after the kids were in bed (yes, it was dark, but so what). He is also a very dedicated father and wants to spend as much time as he can with the kids, so I know where you are coming from. Oh, my DH is also the cook, so he comes home and cooks dinner, and he still has time for exercising and spending time with the kids. He gets home just after 5:00 everyday, though.<br><br>
I think moms and dads are guilty of putting everything first besides themselves, though. I know if I don't have some "me" time, I'm not going to be a very good mom for my 3 kids. Dads need that time too. It will probably be hard for your DH to understand until he actually starts exercising. He will have more energy for his kids, and he will just feel better. If he exercises for 30 mins. 3x a week, he will feel so much better. That is only 1.5 hours out of a week. The rest is for the family. Would your kids want to exercise with him? That is another thought. We take our girls running and biking often. There is no reason why family time and exercise time can't be combined. It would be a great example to your kids (obviously, you are setting a great example, but if DH exercised too, it would be even better, especially since they are all boys). You want them to understand how to balance everything. They need to see dad fitting in some leisure/exercise time as well. Maybe if you talk to DH about that aspect he will understand.
 

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I agree with what was already said as well. My DH gets up early too, but he goes in to work early (he leaves at 6:30) so he can come home early and spend time with the kids. He's done that since we had kids. Not everyone has that option, but most people can get up earlier to exercise before work. I'm not a morning person, but I loved my early morning runs when I did them. (I'll be doing them again soon)
 

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Both my wife and I work full time. So, not only do I have to take into account getting my workout in, I have to allow my wife some time of her own.<br><br>
To do this (well, mostly it accomplishes it) I wake up at 4:15 and try to be out the door by 4:30. This lets me workout, get purtied up, and make it into work by 7:15 - 7:30. I pick up the kids at night and let her play tennis or do scrapbooking, whatever she wants.<br><br>
However, she's not gone every night. She works very close to the gym. So, many times she either works out over lunch or just after work. As I have over an hour commute, even if she works out after, she still can make it home about the time I do with the kids.<br><br>
It isn't the easiest or most convenient way to do it, but it works.
 

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Everybody is right about on point. For me I try to get the training done while DW and Kids are sleeping or busy doing other stuff. which means early morning runs for me.
 

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Up sooooper early in the morning - I'm usually up around 4:30 am on the weekday mornings, and 5-ish on the weekends. DH usually gets morning stuff started, then I make breakfast, eat with her and take her to school. For the days that I work out in the evening, I usually do this close to dd's bedtime - so I'll help her with bath and getting ready for bed, then dh comes in and reads books while I go workout. I only do that 2-3 days a week though, and it works out well as dad likes to have his time with her to read books and do the bedtime stuff to.<br><br>
We only have 1 child, but I can't fathom doing it with more than one - it takes a lot of effort from both me and dh to make it work, but somehow we juggle it and she's never stuck alone in front of the TV!
 

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I 2nd what Kate said. You make time. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. How old are the kids? When my kids were younger I got the jogging stroller, put a child seat on one of my bikes and later (still) used one of those third-wheel trailers. I had to make promises that we’d stop at playgrounds or for a treat (or both) along the way. I take my 9 year old son to the track with me so he can have an ‘imaginary’ football game on the field while I run. We pass the football when I finish running. I got my 12 year old daughter checked out to use the equipment at the gym. She and I workout next to one another, each at their own pace. And, like Kate said, there’s lunchtime. I’ve always done that and then eat at my desk. But I’ve noticed that the people at work who frown on using lunchtime to workout are the ones who think “exercise” is a bad word but spend inordinate amounts of time on smoke breaks.<br><br>
Dan
 

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I will add another voice to the early morning / lunch time crowd. It has always worked for me and actaully helps as we only have one bathroom so me out of the house helps. I have found that there are less resons to skip early mornings froma family / work point of view. Finding a training partner who also works out int he early morning is also very helpful
 

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I have 4 words for you <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Child Center at Gym</span> When my kids would not go - I did not work out. Ours is really nice, and HUGE. They are now in the habit of going right after school for around 1.5 hours. If we don't go - they complain. Bonus for me - they RUN the entire time they are there. Has cut down on the insanity when we get home because they have gotten some energy used up. Have to say bedtime is easier then too. I have all boys so lower insanity at home is always good!<br><br>
J9
 

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Seems like everyone's got wonderful examples of how they manage the little time they have to their family sharing and to workouts and training.<br><br>
Myself, during the workweek, I'll often get up at 4:30am or sometimes earlier depending on what's on the training plan. Then breakfast with my daughter, play together, talk, and get her ready for daycare. On the weekends it probably the hardest, especially when training for Ironman. The volume of training is highest right now (6 weeks out) and I will spend more time away on long running and long bikes. I always talk to her and let her know what I'm doing with training and that I like to do races. I am blessed to have a super supportive wife who understands this time away from family and will always be there for nurturing our little one. We always make time to share something everyday, be it dinner, play time, or reading. During our free weekend time we do plays, musicals, and will have another go at swimming lessons. Yesterday our DD did her first 1k race (I walked with her for support)!<br><br>
I tell my DD that I carry a little reminder of her on my bike, a little hair tie for pony tails, so that it reminds me of her when I am riding, so that I won't miss her so much.<br><br>
I'd rather be remembered by her as a person who loved to do triathlon and running and more importantly a Daddy who was there for her for her important things in her life, not someone who was the best at working 60+ hours a week away from the family. But that's me.
 

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On days I go into the office I workout after work on the way home. The drawback is that I miss bedtime on those days. On days I am at homeiIf DW is able to get up early and workout that frees things up a bit and I just take a lunch break while she feeds the kids or gets them down for naps. On the weekends, I watch the kids in the morning while DW goes to yoga. Then in the afternoon I go out and do my workout during naptime so DW can get some stuff done around the house. We manage by trading off time the best we can. We also made a great playroom for the kids in the basement in view of the area where the weights and treadmill are. They can ride their bikes around and play on the climbers while we workout. The chores around the house suffer so things always seem messy but you cant have it all.
 

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You make it a priority and make the time for it. I'm a lunch hour runner/swimmer and DH runs early in the morning.
 

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I swim in the morning before work and I run or bike in the afternoon as soon as I get home.<br>
Sometimes my weekend workouts are in the morning, sometimes in the afternoon. It just depends on what the family plan is.
 

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Run early and often.<br><br>
Ride three miles with D'Wife & D'Kid to warm up, then turn left when they turn right for home.<br><br>
Go to the gym on Thursday while the girls are at Dance, or Sunday when they're shopping [food, clothes, shoes or any combination thereof]
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Thank you all for your input. I'll have hubby read the thread.<br><br>
The kids are not the issue. They are 15, 13, 11, and 9yo. I want him to workout, so don't mind him being gone.
 
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